You know you’re a Maths teacher when …

1. You’re out with friends and you automatically get the bill at the end of the night to work out how much everyone owes (and they spend the next 2 years taking the piss if you make a mistake!)

2. People insist on telling you how well their young kids can count at any opportunity. It’s lovely to hear, but when I’m off duty I’m not that interested, sorry!

3. You tell people what you do and their reaction is “I hated Maths at school!” Fair enough, I have my moments when I’m not too keen on it myself.

4. Or the alternate response is “ooh, you must be really clever”. Nope, if I was I wouldn’t be getting cheek from spotty teenagers with big attitudes!

5. You will hear at least 14 times a day, “but when will we use this in real-life, miss?” You’re right kids, maths is useless, and employers definitely don’t want people who can count.

6. You get far too excited by a new ruler. I almost had a melt-down when I thought I’d lost mine, it’s quite honestly my favourite item of stationary ever! Very sad, I know!

7. Your “bonus” consists of a graphical calculator!

8. Seeing Daddy Pig using the Quadratic Formula in the episode where Peppa goes to work with Daddy makes your day, and you then show it to your class (who are nowhere near as impressed as you are!)

9. The thought of covering a dance or drama lesson fills you with dread! Too much noise and no desks, my worse nightmare!

10. You have to have a 10th point because I can’t leave it on an odd number. I do this this in class, can’t give the kids an odd number of questions, the only exception is 5 because it’s a round number, if you get what I mean. Oh dear, think I may have a touch of OCD!


  1. Colette B
    November 29, 2013 / 11:12 pm

    This post really made me smile. Whilst I’m not a maths teacher I could still relate to the principles of it lol x

  2. Notmyyearoff
    November 30, 2013 / 10:27 am

    This made me chuckle. Hats off to you, teaching maths to a big group of teens sounds like no easy challenge!

  3. November 30, 2013 / 8:37 pm

    ha great post Jo! I have a friend who is a maths wizz and we always get her to do the bill 🙂
    p.s i am funny about odd numbers too!

  4. November 30, 2013 / 11:57 pm

    The bill always gets complicated when you add in who has had wine and who has not. Even I can’t figure out what to do in that case. But I think that is where a qualification in politics comes in handy.

    Maths teachers are the best!

  5. Colette B
    January 25, 2014 / 9:55 am

    Love this post just as much as the first time I read it! X

  6. January 25, 2014 / 10:17 am

    Ha ha great post. Why would they insist their kids are good at counting? Surely only cos they’re they’re NOT and their mum’s a bit sensitive about it. And like you say, why would you care?

  7. January 25, 2014 / 10:47 am

    Wonderful post! Love the bit about the ruler (maths stationery porn) and also the kids questioning when they’d use it in real life. For me, it was the most useful and transferable bit of school (even though I’m no maths whizz).

  8. Catriona Stephen
    January 25, 2014 / 1:02 pm

    My mum’s a maths teacher and most of these remind me of her!

  9. January 25, 2014 / 6:13 pm

    I live in a house full of maths fans, so I can relate to a lot of this!

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