Mummy Autopilot Moments

Do you ever have moments when you’re driving somewhere, and your mind wanders, and before you know it you’re half way to work before realising it’s Saturday. Or you’ve read eight pages of your book and haven’t got a clue what’s just happened, you’ve just been turning the pages.

Since becoming a mum I quite often find myself going through the motions without really thinking about what I’m doing.  My brain takes a rest and lets the autopilot take over. And this is what happens when my mummy autopilot light is switched on:

  • I tell colleagues when I’m off for a wee wee (and yes, I do tend to say wee wee!)  I don’t know about you but I’m so used to having to explain where I’m going that it becomes second nature whenever nipping to the toilet, and obviously you have to say it in toddler speak.
  • I’ve watched 3 back to back episodes of Ben and Holly before realising the 2 year old has been in bed for the past hour.

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  • I will give a running commentary of my car ride to work before remembering it’s Monday and the kid is at home with his Grandma.
  • I turn into the bad language police and glare at anyone who utters a swear word before muttering “not in front of the kids” whilst shaking my head.
  • And when I’m not playing swear word cop I turn into the good manners fairy “what’s the magic word?” when someone doesn’t say please.
  • I fill my glass to the brim with full fat milk on a Friday (who am I kidding, Monday) night instead of with wine.

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  • I become incapable of saying the word yoghurt, and instead yell across the supermarket to tell hubby to get some yog yog.
  • In fact, when in mummy autopilot mode it is almost impossible to say a word only once.

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  • When presented with my dinner I start cutting it into small bite size chunks as soon as I get it.
  • I call almost everyone love or sweetheart, which earns me a few funny looks from the 15 year olds in my classroom.
  • My first thought when seeing 18 year olds out on a Friday night in the middle of November without a coat is “Oooh, they must be freezing”, despite refusing to wear a coat myself on a night out until I was at least 23 because I hated queues for the cloakroom at the end of the night.

When so much of your time is spent being mum, it’s hard to snap out of it.  So I guess I’ll just have to put up with the strange looks a little while longer!

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17 Comments

  1. September 24, 2014 / 6:55 am

    Haha I love this post all of this os so true I bet all parents can totally relate to this!!! Except the wine one I’m yet to get that wrong (haha mama needs a glass of something good after a tough day, milk certainly wouldn’t cut it!!)
    The running commentary/explaining where you are going made me laugh, we must all look crazy haha! Xx
    seychellesmama recently posted…Our UK trip {Plymouth}My Profile

  2. September 24, 2014 / 8:13 am

    Yep, this is me too! I can definitely relate to the coat thing and also the driving in auto-pilot to certain places when I’m going completely the wrong way – it drives my kids insane! I think we just have too much on our minds. I bet your students love you for all the niceties really 😉 x
    suzanne3childrenandit recently posted…No One Should Face Cancer AloneMy Profile

  3. lifeatthelittlewood
    September 24, 2014 / 10:16 am

    I totally do all of these!! And have also, on occasion, referred to my husband as ‘daddy’ when chatting with friends 🙂 This really made me smile Jo! Xx

  4. Jenny
    September 24, 2014 / 6:52 pm

    This is absolutely brilliant hun! I love it. You have just made me chortle and nod along. I could add about twenty more I am constantly on autopilot and forgetting what I should be doing or saying. Love this. Thank you so much for linking up to Share With Me #sharewithme
    Jenny recently posted…Share With Me ~ wk 34My Profile

  5. September 24, 2014 / 8:31 pm

    Recognise! I used to shout ‘BUS’ every time a bus went past even if I was on my own in the car 🙂 I also feel weird about seeing young girls with no coat on on a night out but it’s so true I used to do it too – we’re turning into our mothers! I’m only just becoming familiar with Ben and Holly’s Little Kingdom because the kids have only just agreed to try out Milkshake (oh no-one warned me about the bloomin’ adverts!!) – I can see how you could be sucked into that little world :-). I say as long as you’re not actually expecting one of your colleagues to follow you into the toilet and watch you do your wee wee then you’re still this side of sane! X #sharewithme
    Sam recently posted…Cbeebies – it’s a love/hate thing…My Profile

    • September 24, 2014 / 8:34 pm

      The day I ask someone other than O to hi-5 for seeing a red car I know I’ve completely lost the plot! x

  6. bloggermummylauren
    September 24, 2014 / 9:10 pm

    Haha, I think I’m running on mummy auto pilot most of the time. It’s funny, I was actually thinking double up on words, like wee wee and din dins, it makes us sound a wee bit silly! I can’t help but talk like that all of the time now though!
    bloggermummylauren recently posted…New Park FunMy Profile

  7. Emily G
    September 24, 2014 / 9:27 pm

    Love this! I think in on autopilot all the time. I drove back to my old house once and also drove to my old place of work. I too have sat watching Cbeebies after Bubs is asleep and all sorts. X
    Emily G recently posted…Martyna Wren’s Vintage Tea Shop Tour – BristolMy Profile

  8. September 25, 2014 / 10:08 am

    Yes, all of this! And calling my husband “daddy” when the kid is not around… I also remember the constant wibbly-wobbling about when my son was still a newborn, even when I wasn’t holding him. These days he’s a bit too big for that, but I do have random panic attacks about whether I have a ready snack in my bag, even when he’s nowhere near me.
    Eline @ Pasta & Patchwork recently posted…Six things preschool teachers would like parents to rememberMy Profile

  9. September 25, 2014 / 12:04 pm

    This happens to me all the time. Only the other day I was thinking to myself that now my eldest two are both at school (separate schools) I wonder how long it would take me to drive to the wrong school at pick up time. Lo and behold I then realised I was at the wrong school! Argh baby brain! x x x
    ghostwritermummy recently posted…An IUGR baby: our story so farMy Profile

  10. Loving life with little ones
    September 25, 2014 / 8:24 pm

    Love this post, I agree with a lot of it, not sure how I get through the day sometimes! #sharewithme

  11. mummyofboygirltwins
    September 26, 2014 / 12:19 pm

    Ha ha ha! Fab! Yes, yes, yes. To it all (apart from the milk thing in the wine glass!). Lol 😉 I drive and realise I am listening to nursery rhymes and then switch on the radio and realise I don’t know any songs! I wonder why!!!!!! Great post x x

  12. September 27, 2014 / 8:31 am

    I’ve found myself playing a game of boo with friends after i’d spent a few days solid of being with my nephew! Needless to say I got some strange looks after I jumped out on them! #brilliantblogposts
    Hayley @ Hay In A Day recently posted…The Cream Of JerseyMy Profile

  13. Caroline
    September 29, 2014 / 6:07 pm

    Alas, I went from parenthood to being an infant teacher…. Twenty years later I retired ……to enjoy grandparenthood.
    I have to concentrate hard to remember to speak like a normal person in adult company. I still carry wipes, tissues and plasters.( I was able to put a plaster on another geriatric on a recent cruise.)
    When I am in charge of adult outings it is all I can do not to send everyone to the toilet before we leave. Your blog made me chuckle, it reminded me how it all began.
    Beware, ladies, you may never be the same again. Keep the sense of humour.

  14. Eleanor (thebristolparent)
    October 2, 2014 / 10:39 am

    By far the worst, most horrible, is when you (as in I) call your partner Daddy in front of other people when your kids aren’t there. ‘wan’t another pint? Daddy’s just gone to the bar’ etc. MEGAHIDEOUSCRINGE moment for me!
    Eleanor (thebristolparent) recently posted…Giving life: would you make your newborn an organ donor?My Profile

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